Tuesday, April 27, 2010

{side effects}

remember this post.
it contained a little snippet about nearly choking to death on a piece of salad  (yes i know, weird)
and then my friend susan having to bust out her first aid skills with the heimlich maneuver.

turns out when all that happens, there are a few side effects.

number one:
the most ridiculous acid-reflux known to man...like crazy ridiculous, i might go insane sort of ridiculous.
i have been living on this, but it's not really helping.
i've barely slept the last 2 weeks.
it's taking it's toll and reared it's ugly head on monday.
when i do sleep, i have to sleep sitting straight up.
every pillow we own, is on my side of the bed.
it's like a ginormous tower of pillows.
craig made me drink milk (YUCK!!!) 
he said it would help.
ok, maybe like for 10 minutes, then it comes back.
UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

number two:
i now have a stupid fear of eating by myself.
what if i choke again?  who will save me?
miley's smart, but not that smart.
so when i am all alone, i only eat this.
the fridge is packed with them.
that's the first thing that popped into my head that i could eat by myself and not choke on.
i went to the store and bought like 50 of them.
i have to say the red velvet cake and the coffee flavors are (excuse the pun) "to die for".
but let's hope not. 
...what's worse than choking on salad?? choking on yogurt.

number three:
well i was really hoping the loud music and flashing disco ball bowling would erase any traumatic events of the evening for this little guy....
but apparently he remembers the whole thing.
his mom says when someone coughs he says "amy choke...scary!"
great, just great.
i really did traumatize the poor thing.
sorry little b...
i'm hoping it will be a nonexistent memory and soon fade away.
... and hopefully take my acid reflux with it.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

my childhood house.

so...i toured my childhood house last week.
from ages 1 to 19, it was my home.
it's up for sale and they were having a open house.
i was really excited to see what it looked like.
all the changes.
all the updates.

i was terribly disappointed.
each room i entered, my heart sank.it was a horrible mess.
i was hoping for all these great memories to come flying back,
but instead was in shock at what it looked like.
this house, the house my dad put his blood, sweat, and tears into...was a neglected mess.
i'm glad my parents did not come.
they would of cried.
like i did.
i bawled and bawled and bawled some more.
hopefully all the other lookers thought i had really bad allergies.

how could they do this to a house?  MY HOUSE???

clearly they just "lived" in it...they never gave it any tlc.
see what i mean?
 it's like they ran out of food and decided to eat the counter top.
i have to look at it with some humor or i will start bawling again.

the kitchen still had the original dishwasher....that my dad put in. 
i'm shocked that it still works...
i crammed it full when it was my job.
by the looks of it, you'd swear it was still 1974.
it was once a duplex.
we lived downstairs and someone who worked for my dad lived upstairs.
when they moved out, we moved upstairs so dad could remodel the downstairs. 
it was a full blown 70's brady bunch remodel.
..and really? no one ever bothered to update it?
maybe it's just me...i can't seem to leave a house alone.
i'm always thinking of ways to improve it.
obviously, i got that from my dad. :)

i gasped when i walked into the bathroom.
WHAT?  REALLY??  your trying to sell this house???
when we lived here...the vanity and the tub were swapped.
they should of left it.
i'm guessing it's gonna be a little difficult to look in the mirror when it's a window.
...and typically one has a sink in the bathroom.
just say'n.
and usually plumbing.

are you starting to see why it upset me so much?
nice try with the faux stainless steel.  
those were the original kitchen cabinets before the remodel.
they were either dark brown or green...i can't remember.
 so are they just gonna hang that thing over the window?

this was my old room.
it used to be pink, pink, pink, hearts, hearts, hearts.
 i used to crawl out that window and sunbathe on the roof.  :)
 it looks as if these people were using it as the master.
i wonder if they enjoyed the strobe light.
 1st rule when putting up a ceiling fan...
make sure the blades aren't sweeping under a light fixture, 
cause when they both are on...you will get dizzy!
trust me! 
my dad felt really bad about that.

one thing that did make me smile...
my old smurf tape was still stuck to the window :)
i laughed out loud, not realizing someone else was in the room.
i just pointed and said "smurf tape"  like a doofus.

i learned to sew in this room.
minus the dora border, and the pink and blue.
this was my parents room.
when they moved out it was country blue with ducks,
not psychedelic lilac.

however, the bright pink bathroom upstairs was our doing..it hadn't changed at all.

except we had a toilet.
they really must have something against plumbing in this house...
where's the potty?

this made me laugh too.
when no one was home, i would sing my brains out over the intercom.

when i was in high school i moved downstairs to this room.
which was not this color.  it had shiny metallic wallpaper.
i actually do like this color, but they must have been drinking when they painted it.
there was paint all over the ceiling and trim.
umm hello??  painters tape.

ok, now we've come to the part that hurts the worse.
my beloved playhouse.
my dad worked his booty off to get me this playhouse.
i spent all my time in it.
it looks like they let bears live in it, or on it.
it used to be beautiful, quaint, peaceful.
a kids dream house.
whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i wish i would of taken it with me.
i wish, i wish, i wish!

after brushing back a ton of leaves, i found this.
we built a garage and put in a long driveway in 1978.
i remember some guy holding me upside down from my ankles so i could press in my hand print.
i wasn't long enough like my brother to hang off the side of the stairs to reach.
just for kicks.

well ok, i know that was a ridiculously long post.
sorry about that...i apparently needed to vent.
it was a very emotional day for me.
when i got into my car to leave, i called my dad...bawling.
telling him all about it.
glad that he didn't come.

then i went home and did what any emotionally distraught person would do.

i made  fudge brownies...
and ate half the pan.

oh, like you've never done that.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

my weekend.

how's your weekend going?
so far i've been pretty productive.
but the computer likes to sidetrack me...


it doesn't like it when i hang out all day with mr. swiffer
but i needed too...desperately.

i finally sat down a paid some attention to these guys too.
i am way behind in my magazine reading.

from my jones zilch soda....
i'm really hoping it's my favorite sunglasses that i haven't seen in like 6 years.
that would be awesome. 
i bought them in california 10 yrs ago...for 5 bucks!
one day poof, gone.

all the flowers are planted.
just in time for the spring rainstorms.
let's hope everything grows,
and the squirrels don't dig them all out.

i could list 50 more things i did this weekend, but i'll spare you...

so what did you do this weekend?

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

country drive.

i took a drive to po dunk, kansas the other day to pick something up.
if your not familiar with po dunk...it's right in between hicksville & blahsville.
you know...make a left at the second black cow, past the windmill to the north of the
big red barn....oh, you have been there.


yes, the country can be pretty...
we all know that i prefer beaches to barns though.
but since i couldn't find one beach, not one, barns it is.
(and cows. and fields. and hay bales. and...country stuff.)
its almost like he knew i was picking up my 1/4 beef from the butcher.
and that it was sitting in the back of my car while i took his picture.

"really, i am sorry about your cousin frank
all chopped up laying in the back of my car,
but could you give me a big country smile"

yes, your right...that was a bit insensitive.
mooooving on...
i found a road full of limestone rocks.
they were everywhere.
just sitting there...all lonely looking for a ride home.
some of them hopped into my backseat.
i mean, how could i just leave them there...all alone in the middle of nowhere?
which by the way is 4 cows past the white barn, and then take a left at the blue silo.
if you pass the green combine with the farmer in a red bandanna, then you've gone too far.